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View from the cemetery - October 2015 - 4

Submitted by Ghostly Gadgie on Saturday, 24 October 2015

All pukka down in our little part of the woods, what? Makes a change, long time since we were looking down on the rest of the league, or most of them, from the lofty heights. Be playing hell with some of these prediction competitions, mine included. Keep it up, keep it up, as the actress said to the bishop....

I must at this point make a profound apology to all those good people who have laid out £100 on a Man United replica kit, for mistakenly describing them as dipsticks last week. I can only say in my defence that when I made this error I had not yet seen the start of this year's series of The Apprentice. I now appreciate that the good and loyal people of Madchester are all potential Prime Ministers when compared to Lord Sugar's, (always makes you laugh that, don't it?), motley crew of candidates. Where do they get them from? Mind, very heartening for those who have missed out on an education of sorts, most of these can barely speak never mind read, write or count, and it doesn't seem to have slowed them down much. Relentless self promotion is the key to success it seems. Though it doesn't seem to do much for the advancement of women in the world. However bad the men are, and they are very poor indeed, the women always manage to look worse. Very London based as well, makes me fear for our young people trying to make their way in the world. Seems like if you can walk in a straight line without falling over you are a potential superstar down "sarf". Sadly, I think the only sensible advice for our young and ambitious is to get on the bus and head down there. Anyway the star of the show is the luminous Karen Brady, one of those women who gets more attractive the older she gets. Yes indeedy. Helped no doubt by top class hairdressing, make up and other grooming. But I'm not knocking it. All the way from a pornographer's assistant to the House of Lords and the telly, fantastic.

And finally of course, Sunday is derby day for the big boys. I use the term loosely of course. Can it possibly be six in a row to finally start the season for the hapless of Monkwearmouth? I certainly hope so. I may take the proverbial out of them from time to time, and very well deserved it is too, but when it comes to Sunderland versus the Mags, well, I know who's side I'm on.